Open Letter to Daniel Tosh

I have recently become a huge Daniel Tosh/Tosh.O fan. So much so, that last night as I was channel flipping between the Boston Celtics/Milwaukee Bucks game and “Happy Thoughts” on Comedy Central, I actually posted my Facebook status to read…”Celtics game/Daniel Tosh…I really need a picture in picture television”. You know it’s real when it becomes Facebook official. Anyhow, it wasn’t 2 minutes later as I flipped from a lazy Celtics offense back to Daniel Tosh’s Happy Thoughts that ol’ Daniel rips into the Mormons. Was I offended? No, I don’t become offended (which is probably not a good thing), but I did delete my Facebook status and changed it to read “Celtics!”

So what’s my point you ask? I’m not really sure but if I spew enough bs in this email I’ll come up with something eventually, because I reside as much as the next guy (gal) down in the gutter. However, when it comes to my faith (Yes I’m a Mormon), I become protective. Similar to the mentality of I can ‘pick on my siblings but if anyone else does it, that’s just not OK.’ Oh wait, I found my point…If you become Mormon you can make all the jokes you want, because they are funny, but coming from a non-Mormon I’m just left shaking my head.

30 Day Challenge: Day 6 - One Person I Couldn't Imagine My Life Without

In trying to come up with something quirky I tried to think of those people who operate behind the scenes. You know who I'm talking about...the zamboni guy, the toll booth man who wears the rubber gloves, the creepy bottle guy who hangs out down at the softball field, the woman sitting in the corner sewing on patches at the dry cleaners, and of course the pimply faced kid standing over the fryolator at your favorite fast food restaurant. Anyhow, if none of these people existed, my life would still go on. Therefore the award goes to....

Mom! Mom! Mom! Mommy! Mommy! Mommy! Momma! Momma! Momma! Ma! Ma! Ma! Ma! Mom! Mom! Mom! Mom! Mommy! Mommy! Momma! Momma! Momma! Mom!

That's right folks, my mother brought me into this world. (Please direct all complaints or inquiries to her @ 502-555-1212) She is my best friend, my confidant, my conscience when I happen to misplace mine, my children's Gramma, and she'll most likely be my roommate at the psyche ward when we are old & gray.

Let me tell you quickly a little about this incredible lady...born Mary Celeste Hubert on 6.26.56, yes there was electricity back then, only the man in the hamster wheel had to run for many hours. She is the 2nd oldest of 5 and still went on to have 6 children of her own. "What were you thinking crazy lady?!?" She graduated college with honors as an adult with 2 babies at home...yes ladies and gents this is SuperWoman...afterall where do you think I get my greatness from? Geesh!!!

When she moved to Utah those many moons ago I thought I was was losing part of me...however through our long telephone calls and trips across country I have grown closer to her. She now lives in Kentucky with her husband Mark and the last of the babies, Tavane. I miss not being able to just drop in unnaounced like I so often did (Oh wait...maybe that's why she moved in the 1st place?!?) but look forward to our gatherings.

I love you Mom!!

30 Day Challenge - Day 5: The Day in the Life of Me

Yes, this is my 2nd post today but I'm going to skip Saturday & Sunday so I'm trying to be proactive...

This is my M-F schedule....S-S is totally different depending on season, if the kids are home or not, how much sleep do I need to catch up on before I get admitted into the psych hospital...you get the picture!!

5:27am - Alarm starts to go off. By the time I'm actually cognisant and crawl myself out of bed to walk over to the end table that holds the alarm clock, (which is on the other side of the room) it's now showing 5:28am. At this point in time I'm hitting the snooze button, Cullen is crawling into my bed that I just vacated, and the house is completely silent. I walk back over to my bed, push Cullen off of my pillows and enjoy 9 more minutes of peaceful slumber!!

5:37am - Repeat steps above.

5:47am - From my nice warm bed I travel once more to the evil sound machine and turn it off. Head over to the television and turn on Sportscenter. (highlights from today...Garnett was ejected for hitting the Sun's Frye in the family jewels. Then BYU's Brandon Davies was kicked off the team for inapprorpiate conduct with his girlfriend....way to go BYU for sticking with your principles.) This is my official start to my day. Around my room I pace, debating on today's attire, stopping once, twice, three times to pet Cullen and thank him for not snoring throughout the night. Walk downstairs, let Cullen out, and grab my bathrobe to hit the shower.

6:15am - Cullen has already let himself back into the house. Once in awhile a child or two has found their way to the couch and has turned on the Disney Channel. More often then not however, this is not the case and I'm left to go wake up my children. Walking to their rooms making as much noise as physically possible I turn on their lights and proceed to bang on their wall and say "Wake up "Princess", Wake up "Bub"...I need to go to work and you need to get your butts in the livingroom for a family prayer."

6:30am - Kids are up, prayer has been said, meds have been distributed, Cullen is in the car, homework has been placed in kids bags, and I'm out the door.

(Now from 6:30-7:30 my kids are on their own...they feed & clothe themselves and I have yet to hear they have missed the school bus so hallelujah!!)

6:40am - I stop at C&S Market on 201 and fill up with gas (3 times a week) and grab a milk or juice and a peanut butter protein bar.

7:00am - hitting the Gardiner toll plaza...I love the Transpass system!! Do you know if I was to pay that toll out of pocket everyday it would cost me over $40/month? Yet by having a commuter plan it only costs me less than $40/every 3 months...BONUS!! So by this point in time I'm just about done listening to George Hale & Rick Tyler...because I can only handle so much of George...I flip the station over to Ray & Ted or Shoe & Joe. In case anyone is actually wondering...George, Rick, Ray, & Ted provide me with my daily political insight and Shoe & Joe provide me with the sports rundown from which I tried watching whiling pacing around my room.)

7:30am - should be around Freeport/Yarmouth depending on how much texting & driving I've been doing. Oh wait! I didn't really mean that...I'm a perfectly safe driver!! :-)

8:00am - I arrive at my earthly prison and check in with the warden. By warden I mean the million voicemail messages that I neglected to answer yesterday afternoon. I turn on computers, photocopiers, plotters, scanners, death ray guns, and whatever else requires my assistance to get up and running in the morning. I finally settle down and run down throught he 2 million emails I've received since 5pm yesterday. Not all of them because they come to my phone but if they aren't jokes or something mundane...I can guarantee you I didn't do anything with them after 5pm yesterday evening.

8am-12:30pm - If you've ever dealt with construction you can understand why my blood pressure probably doubled in this time frame. Contractors can be "@**#^$^&"...not any of my customers however...they are all angels. (*cough cough*)

12:30pm - I take off to run errands, fake & bake, hit the gym, grab lunch, or just people watch the funny individuals that come out on a warm sunny afternoon. For the next 60-90 minutes, depending on my mood, I just veg and return my blood pressure to its normal operating levels.

2:00-5pm - Please refer to the 8am-12:30pm time slot!! Thank you!!

5pm - Portland traffic...Nuf said!!

5:15pm - On I95 headed home...this is when I unwind, destress, think about world domination. Oh crap forgot to call ................................ (fill in the blank with any number of people, vendors, etc) Call the kids and ask "What do you want for dinner?" Listen to them argue for 5 minutes while they decide on who should be answering the phone. Repeat previous question. Turn on the Big Jab and ask myself daily, "how does Sedenka actually have a job as a radio personality?!?" Switch over to WPOR (Country station), then 92 Moose (crap station), and then finally deciding afternoon radio sucks, I turn on Pandora from the wonderful app on my phone.

6:15pm - Stop at Hannaford's (or Walmart) in Augusta to pick up whatever the kids decided. Mull around the store because I know going home means I have to clean house...ughhh!!! Hmm...maybe I should walk down this aisle....

6:45pm - Arrive home to find Keagan up in my room watching the Cartoon Network and Taliya, who has moved the couch to within inches of the televison, watching Operation Repo in the living room...she DVR's this stuff religiously, I kid you not. I ask if homework is done. They say "yes" but I know it's not....we'll get to that after dinner. Kids help with dinner by staying out of my way. We eat...well I eat, Keagan is telling me about some Therapuetic mattress sample he just ordered from some infomercial, Taliya is complaining that the expiration date may be bad on the milk because well she's OCD like that, and Cullen...oops I forgot he was still outside.

7:30pm - Start getting the kids in the shower, homework finished, house picked up, dog fed, and where was it I placed my sanity?!?

8:30pm - Kids should be in bed but we all know that's not happening without an act of Congress and with the GOP controlling the House and the Libs controlling the Senate...that could be awhile!!

9pm - Most nights I should be crawling into bed right about now so I can start my routine all over tomorrow! However, I drank that Pepsi while out running errands and now I'm stuck awake until 11-12am.

Welcome to my day!!

30 Day Challenge: Day 4 - My Favorite Book

Books!!

I love books! Not just to read mind you but to have them sitting on my shelf...don't ask why because I really have no idea. (Yes, this is also one of the reasons my house is cluttered, I have no more shelf space) If there is a "free for the taking" hard covered book...she's coming home with me. I'll either get around to reading it eventually or Cullen will take it upon himself to enjoy a literacy moment, usually in the form of teething. Either way, it's a hard covered book...I can't just leave it there against the elements.


My shelves are filled with church resource books, political (right leaning of course) books, fiction, nonfiction, Pokemon (guess what?? not mine! but for the sake of prosperity we keep it on the shelf), coloring books, how to books, sports books (no, not for betting) etc... Do you remember those life saver books you would get for Christmas?? Well I don't have any of those on the shelves but I thought those were pretty cool back in the day.


I have all the Harry Potter books & the Twilight series. You can't miss them because they are located behind the bullet proof glass enclosure with the strobe lights. Well in all honesty I just found 2 of the HP books & Eclipse under my bed, Cullen was obviously reading the Prisoner of Azkaban & Eclipse recently. Now that I'm thinking about it...I will be having a word with him shortly. Anywho...you would think these are my favorites...bwahahaha...that's where you'd be wrong.


My favorite book of all time is actually a Jude Deveraux novel. Stop rolling your eyes....I know she's a romance novelist but her book "A Knight in Shining Armor" is hands down my favorite. I'm waiting patiently for my own Sir Nicholas Stafford. I've read that little paperback a million times and as long as I keep it away from Cullen, hopefully a million more.

30 Day Challenge: Day 3--My Favorite Television Show

My favorite television show would lead someone to believe that I actually have time to sit down and watch a show on a regular basis. Well, that's certainly not the case. I could not even tell you what's on television at any given time because I'm basically clueless.

On that note, if anyone has ever been to my house they know my television is either tuned to Sportscenter, NESN, or the Disney Channel. Would I consider any of these my favorites...not so much (OK...NESN may be the closest thing to a favorite). It takes me about 2 hours to get through the highlights on ESPN because I'm usually doing something else and my kids are normally watching the Disney Channel when I get home. However, I do have a secret obsession with the Wizards of Waverly Place...Shhhhhhhhhh! NESN of course is home to my Bean Town Boys, the Boston Red Sox, Celtics, & Bruins. Patriots play on CBS or Fox.

When I do have that moment to sit back an enjoy the boob tube I like to find a crime show such as Criminal Minds (Shemar Moore...ooh-la-la), CSI (any of them work), or Law & Order. I will also watch anything of comedy such as the Big Bang Theory, How I Met Your Mother, & any reruns from the '80-90's. If I'm watching with Miss Taliya we are watching Operation Repo, Cake Boss, or Jerseylicious. I think I just lost IQ points typing J-e-r-s-e-y-l-i-c-i-o-u-s. Keagan is content on the Cartoon Network and I just can not bring myself to do cartoons...any of them.

30 Day Challenge: Day 2 - 5 Little Things That Make Me Happy

What Makes Me Happy?!? I guess I've never stopped long enough to really contemplate this simple question. Where does my true joy & happiness stem from? So I've pondered this question and here are the reults:

1.) Softball! Need I say anything more?!? Give me a sunny (I'll even take warm & rainy) day on a field with great friends and there isn't a worry in the world. (Well unless Trevy parks to close to the right field line.) Being physically active is a neccessity for being happy...it keeps those endorphins moving.

2.) A Peanut Buster Parfait from DQ on a hot summer's day. A good book & my fleece blanket in front of the fireplace on a cold rainy day. A sled & Sherwin Hill on a beautiful winter afternoon. A bonfire & family on a chilly fall evening.

3.) Keagan & Taliya! In advance, I'd like to apologize to them for the utter crazy life I have given them. However, it's also this crazy life that as helped make them into the unique individuals that they are becoming. Their random "aha" moments bring smiles to my face daily. Keagan's ability to fantasize about fictional characters and their purpose in the universe is incredibly creative. The fact he can transfer those images into drawings and physical creations is amazing. Taliya has her own image of the world and I belive it's called "Taliyaville". I find joy in the fact that my children have minds of their own...completely different from one another but bound by a sibling connection.

4.) My friends & family! This isn't to say my happiness is based on these individuals but I certainly would be unhappy without each one of them in my life. Yes, that even means those whom bring me stress and grief more often than not. (You know who you are!) Each person with whom I interact has some purpose in my life. They can be a permanent fixture or just a passing acquaintence but regardless, they have a purpose. That purpose brings happiness or joy in some aspect.

5.) Reading the scriptures! This actually surprises me...I know it shouldn't but it does. In the world of organized chaos in which I consider my life, there are few moments of solitude or peaceful serenity. It's these moments that I find I'm most at ease, I'm connected with that true moment of joy & happiness that will most likely be lost throughout the chaos of my day. Why don't I seek these moments more often...I become bored way too easily!

30 Day Blog Challenge - Day 1

Seeing as though it's been years since I've updated our blog, I'm going to steal my good friend Melanie's wonderful idea and take the 30 Day Blog Challenge. Today's topic: 15 Things About Me.

1. I love shoes, all types, but prefer to go barefoot.

2. My mother is my best friend and conscience when I'm too close to the issue to see around it.

3. My world is crazy & mostly unorganized, however if it was any slower I'd be bored.

4. I originally attended college to become a sports psychologist.

5. I'm the 2nd oldest of 6 children (3 brothers & 2 sisters).

6.. I'm afraid of spiders.

7. I love to explore new places and learn the local culture.

8. Rollercoasters are my idea of a perfect outing.

9. I read everything I can put my hands on...from the back of cereal boxes to the small print on contracts & insurance policies.

10. I never blow dry my hair.

11. I hope to one day have degrees in political science, American history, mathematics, & mechanical engineering.

12. I love math and logic problems.

13. I want to learn how to garden.

14. I enjoy peanut butter, jelly, fluff, & pickle sandwiches

15. I love my Lord & Savior Jesus Christ